Family

April 24th 2009. I woke up to my Mum ringing my mobile, knowing I would be either getting up, or already on my way to work. Very calmly she told me that my dad had been in an accident. That he was okay. He was alive. And for now that is all that we could hope. My dad had been driving a trailer of wrecked cars down to Newcastle, when the driver of the other semi-trailer veered onto the wrong side of the road. The driver of the other vehicle died at the scene. My mum very calmly asked me to please call my sister, who lived in Townsville. She'd tried calling but my sister wasn't answering, and she knew that Alisyn would pick up if I called her at that time - she would know something is wrong.

Mum said that she was already in Lismore - she had gone down earlier that morning and had waited to see how Dad was before calling each of us. Later she told us that she wanted to see him first, and have her breakdown, before having to call and tell us how things were looking. She also told me not to rush down to see him. He was in and out of conciousness, and we probably wouldn't get to see him anyway as he was in ICU. I called my boss, and had a bit of a breakdown. We had a huge tender due that day, and I kept saying "I will come in, do that, and go home" and he very calmly told me to stay at home, wait and see what happens. That way if I need to go - I can do that. Just go. He rang numerous times throughout the day to see what the verdict was, and to keep updated on how things were going. I called one of my girlfriends, who came over and sat with me, and watched movies to keep my mind occupied. Chris had to go to work for the day, as he had alot to get done too, and since Mum had said not to rush down to Lismore (which is about a 3hr drive from Brisbane) I spent the day googling the accident, trying to find out as much as I could about what was going on. What had happened.

After organising my hockey commitments for the weekend, so that I could make the trip down on the Saturday, and ensuring that we had all my commitments covered, we went down to see him. He was in a pretty bad way. I saw him just lying there and passed out. Luckily Chris was there to catch me otherwise I very well could've ended up in the bed beside him. Dad, Bless him, was more worried about me than what he was himself. His injuries were quite extensive - he had a few broken ribs, broken collarbone, fractured vertebrae, broken nose, glass embedded all over his body, two broken arms, shattered kneecap, broken bones in his ankles..and the list goes on. He later had to have surgery on his kneecap - basically they did a bone graft from his hip to his knee to rebuild what had been shattered. He was unable to be moved from Lismore from weeks, and when he finally was, he was moved to a hospital in brisbane - closer to home. He spent a while in there, recieving endless surgeries and treatments. And finally, he was able to go home. His rehab is ongoing, he won't ever be the same again. For such a strong man, I saw him at his weakest, solely reliant on my mother to feed him, shower him, clothe him. I see the emotion in his eyes when he plays with the grandkids, how upset he gets when talking about that day. What went through his mind.

He told me that he was lying there, just telling himself to stay awake. He knew if he had've drifted out of conciousness, he wouldn't have woken up. He told me he felt bad for the family of the other driver, but in a way he was glad it wasn't his family having to deal with that loss. We found out that being the strong person he is - as soon as it happened - he put a warning out on the radio (even as messed up as he was) to warn other drivers of the accident, as it was around a bend and there was a high chance another truck could have hit the wreckage. He told me that he kept himself awake just thinking about us - his kids - and my mum. He told us how he tried to call my mum's mobile to tell her something had happened, because he didn't want her to find out second hand from someone else. When he couldn't get through, and the police finally showed up to the scene, he demanded that the local police back home go around to be with her when she found out...he didn't want her to be alone. He was so strong - so tough - in such a time of crisis. He never stopped thinking about his family - not even to think of himself.

My Dad has always been a huge inspiration to me. Yes we've had our differences, but coming so close to losing him made us all realise how much we still want him around. My Mum - such an amazing woman - showed true strength to just be beside him. Help him through his rehab. It showed me the importance of the vows you make when you commit to marrying someone. It's not "till I can't do this anymore" ... it really is "till death". My Mum showed me that. My parents showed me that.

Everyone has their differences...everyone has hiccups in life. But its how we overcome these, and the strength we show to move forward in life, that make us the people that we are today.

 My Dad in hospital nearly a week after the accident - with my niece Isabella - so proud to be a Grandad. All he wanted was some photos with the kids just in case he didn't make it. He wanted them to remember him.

http://www.farnorthcoaster.com.au/news/4139/semi-trailers-collide-near-iluka-driver-dies/

An article on the accident.

  The difference time can make. Mum and Dad - a year on from the accident at our Engagement party.